Psycho Series 1

She said I could sit anywhere I wanted. I chose the couch. I like my space...and the open choice to fling myself dramatically across a soft cushion if the need arises.

"Do you have any questions before we start?"

Yes. I set out a small to-go cup of peaches on the little table between the bowl of gumdrops and the bowl of jollyranchers. Can I eat?

We settled in. I told her why I was there, as best as I could summarize.

"Any homicidal tendencies? Are you a possible danger to yourself or others?"

I stared at her.

"Okay no," she jotted on her pad, "Except occassionally toward her mother..."

I smiled. We talked. She set an even pace and, instead of the slow neutral nods of so many other therapists, she reacted to what I said. This was good.

"Do you have any questions before we end today?"

Yes. Can you help me?

She smiled. "Yes."

Next session is next Thursday morning. We will choose the best type of mental therapy. We will set goals. We will discuss how much flatulence is too much and how to patent the boyfriend buttcork.