Gobble Gobble Ba-GAWK!
Things I Did Over Thanksgiving Break:
- Get my period. Woo hoo, guess who’s not pregnant?
- Get a call confirming that I have Mono. No woo hoo. This never ever deserves a woo hoo, not even the part about losing weight.
- Sleep. A LOT. Once my eyes are open I’m ready to sleep again.
- Slip into my sister’s jeans and discovered that I am now skinnier than her, thereby royally pissing her off.
- Convince my step-grandmother that I am not pregnant and I am, in fact, sick. And no, grandma, I can’t have a baby for you right now, but I promise that once I do, you’ll be taking care of it all the time.
- Piss off the mother of the boy I was nannying for. In my fatigue and stupor, I forgot to bring her number to Jason’s house and had to email her to cancel a Saturday night nanny appointment. When she finally called, she derailed on me for not calling and ruining their night and hung up. So much for that job!
- Clean up Jason’s vomit. One moment he’s complaining of a tummy ache and the next thing I know, he’s hurtling himself across the bedroom spewing chunks on our clothes, through the hallway, and into the toilet. It was the Mexican we had for lunch. Put me off tamales for life.
- Ask Jason to take me out to buy “yarn and prune juice”.
- Break Jason’s family’s microwave. Bye bye faithful microwave.
- Watched Matrix Revolution…FINALLY…after years of only catching the first two movies on cable. I’m disappointed; I kept saying, “What the hell is happening? I don’t understand” and I can’t believe Neo and Trinity die. I am, however, considering naming my daughter Trinity…hm…
- Poop. Still working on that one. C’mon prune juice, c’mon!
- Eat Thanksgiving dinner. Thank you, Mono.
- Explain to my sister why there were condoms in my nightstand. Her icy silence and refusal to look at me for the rest of the night pretty much convinced me that it wasn’t worth it to explain. She can assume what she wants, but if she wants to know the truth, she should be mature enough to ask.
- Say no to chocolate cake and vanilla ice cream. I’m sorry, but even Mono can’t keep me from that.
- Tell my parents that my internship is ending in a week and I am considering being a nanny. Not quite sure what I’m going to do yet so until then, they’re better off not knowing. Parents have a way of adding stress to stress.
- See my counselor. Don’t think she would have appreciated me passing out on her couch.
- Did I mention poop? Hellloooo down there, give me a break! Haven’t I suffered enough?!
posted by The mini ninja at 4:58 PM
6 Comments:
I completely agree with "Parents have a way of adding stress to stress". When I went to the doctor two weeks ago because I was feeling like crap, all my Mom could ask me about was whether I asked the doctor about getting a mammogram. Sigh. I'm only 31, but she's convinced I'm riddled with cancer for some reason. I told her I was more worried about the poblems I'm having RIGHT NOW, which has shut her up for now.
Yay for chocolate cake and vanilla ice cream!
Oh my goodness gracious do you crack me up.
Things I did NOT do.
Poop.
Did I mention poop?
LOL!!! Too much!
I'm sorry you're feeling so awful. I remember mono. Not fun. No not at all.
I'm pretty sure that I had a relatively mild case of it. But I did sleep an awful lot when I had it though. Can't keep that from happening. Boo.
I had the same thoughts when I watched the last Matrix movie. I still don't think I get it...
What was the yarn for? Is there a chance that I'm not the only person under 50 that likes to knit?? :)
At some point in our growing up lives, my brother and I each independently figured out that we shouldn't tell our parents about major life decisions until it was too late to be talked out of them. If they know too soon they worry and nag and get you all upset ('adding stress to stress' is exactly the right way to word it). If they know after, then it's too late for that. I'm glad to know it's not just my family!
And I'm also puzzled by the yarn. Is it for your knitting machine? What are you making? What kind of yarn?
Lori – Oh I totally relate. My mom called me a few days after Thanksgiving and burst into tears. I told her that it’s best to “take it one day at a time”. I meant it as an encouragement, but she took that to mean that I only had days left to live, and she started crying all the harder, saying, “But you’re so young, you should have years and years ahead of you…”
Sigh. I thought I was the only one allowed to be irrational since I’M the sick one.
Stephanie – If you can’t beat ‘em, laugh at ‘em. That’s pretty much the motto of my life.
Fortunately I’m starting to feel better. I will never take the feeling of being awake for granted again!
Emerald – Haha, YES they die. Stupid. They were supposed to ride off into the Matrix sunset and have lots of pre-manufactured babies.
I also hope things “come out” okay soon. Sigh.
Kjersten – Yeah I’m sorely disappointed. I loved the first two Matrix movies so much. I even bought the sunglasses that the twin clones wore! But the last movie? What?! I don’t get it. The death scene was very drawn out, too. In the middle of the scene, Jason burst out with, “Just DIE already, GEEZ!” Poor Trinity.
No, you’re definitely not the only person under 50 who loves to knit! I loooove it. I’ve been knitting on looms. So much faster and easier.
Kimananda – You’re family is definitely NOT the only one with parents who add stress to stress. I mean, with big life decisions, you’re stressed enough as it is. You don’t need mum to say, “Doing that will make you into an old maid for life” or dad to say, “I think you’ve chosen the wrong decision and you’re going to suffer the consequences”. Nope, you just want to be left alone and make the decision without knowing that you’re going to “bring down the family name”. Ha.
The yarn is for my knitting projects. I can’t say what I’m making in case certain people read this blog, but suffice it to say that I’ll tell you once a certain big holiday is over! (Oh, and the yarn is soft suede. Beautiful.)
One thing you will learn about parents with small children is that they would kill for a night off - and kill YOU if they don't get it! ;-)
Gab At Les
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